Ruth Black
Bridal showers blend practicality and joy, equipping the couple with essential home items while celebrating their union. They offer a cherished opportunity for friends and family to connect before the wedding. As a host, navigating decisions and etiquette can feel overwhelming—but with these proven tips from event expert Claudia Lutman, owner of Claudia Lutman Events, you can plan a flawless gathering.
Etiquette rules have evolved. Traditionally, the bride's family avoided hosting to prevent any perception of soliciting gifts. Today, "anyone except the couple themselves can host," Lutman explains—even for bachelorette-style events.
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"Bridal showers are intimate affairs," notes Lutman. Invite family, close friends, bridal attendants, the flower girl and her mother, sisters of the bride and groom, and grandmothers. As a rule, shower guests should also attend the wedding—except for office colleague showers, where not all coworkers can be invited.
Jack-and-Jill co-ed showers are increasingly popular. "Tradition was women-only, but now couples include grooms' friends and family," says Lutman. These events shine with themes like "stock the bar" or "stock the toolbox."
Lutman recommends hosting 2-8 weeks before the wedding, ideally at the host's home. Alternatives like restaurants, country clubs, churches, or banquet halls work well. Choose spots reflecting the couple's interests—a racetrack, bowling alley, museum, or park—for memorable touches, ensuring guest comfort.
Philip Stridh
"Absolutely," affirms Lutman. Themes focus the fun and guide gifts to the couple's needs, like kitchen, bathroom, housewares, or lingerie showers. Honeymoon, garden, or gourmet wine themes are hits too. Couples can create a separate registry, but avoid listing it on the invitation—use a separate insert for registry details, colors, sizes, or wish lists.
Gordana Sermek
Invitations set the tone, so mail them 3-4 weeks ahead. Though e-invites are common, Lutman prefers paper to avoid spam filters.
Tailor to timing: For morning showers ending by 11:30 a.m., offer yogurt parfaits, granola, bagels with lox, muffins, pastries, mimosas, Bloody Marys, punch, coffee, and tea. Evening events suit dessert buffets; co-ed ones, cookouts or clambakes.
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Open during or after dessert, near the end, says Lutman. This highlights the moment without distractions from food service or greetings.
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